nentindo:

kidshade:

ediebrit:

IM FUCKING SCREAMING

IM IN FUCKING STITCHES 

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the only thing funnier than this video are the comments on it

(via geothebio)

"kissy face"

mermaidsofcolor:

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digital illustration; a mermaid makes a horsie friend!

art by nidhiart
deviantart

(via misandry-mermaid)

mmmbuttery:

queelez:

lord-of-the-nerds:

discordion:

When he was 2 years old, he fell out of a second story window and fractured his skull
When he was 6 years old, he mistakenly drank boric acid.
When he was 9 years old, he fell over a small cliff and broke his leg.
When he was 11 years old, he contracted measles and was in a coma for nine days.
When he was 14 years old, he broke his arm when he caught it in a carriage door.
When he was 19 years old, he was struck on the head by a falling brick.
When he was 23 years old, he almost died from the effects of tainted wine.
When he was 29 years old, Adolph Sax invented the saxophone.

clearly someone didn’t want that saxophone invented 

#incompetent time-travelling saxophone haters

rob-anybody  -#i just want this to be a movie#starring christopher walken and dwayne johnson
"You had one job!"  The Master scowled.  "If the saxophone is developed, there will be too much bad incidental sex music in movies.  We can not allow that to happen!""I tried.  And I tried."  The assassin looked defiant."And tried, and tried, and failed.  And FAILED."  The Master looked at the glowing screen, which showed the slide show of every attempt made on the Boy’s life."We still delayed saxophone development by years."  The assassin was always one to look on the bright side of life.  Especially since it was his life now that was on the line.
"And with every attempt, you have made him stronger!  He’s almost 30 now!"  The Master pointed at the last series of shots, of a tall, beautiful brown-skinned man slowly taking off his cravat and unbuttoning his frilly shirt, revealing amazing developed pectorals and seriously cut abs the smooth skin marred with several scars.  The subject turned, and the tight-fitting trousers failed, much like the assassin, to conceal the magic within.  "Look at him!"
"I am - I am!"
"Not like that!"  The Master slapped his riding crop across the screen, startling the assassin.  "You’re going to have to go back.  Try again."
"Okay."
The Master looked grim.  “Try not to sound so happy.”

mmmbuttery:

queelez:

lord-of-the-nerds:

discordion:

When he was 2 years old, he fell out of a second story window and fractured his skull

When he was 6 years old, he mistakenly drank boric acid.

When he was 9 years old, he fell over a small cliff and broke his leg.

When he was 11 years old, he contracted measles and was in a coma for nine days.

When he was 14 years old, he broke his arm when he caught it in a carriage door.

When he was 19 years old, he was struck on the head by a falling brick.

When he was 23 years old, he almost died from the effects of tainted wine.

When he was 29 years old, Adolph Sax invented the saxophone.

clearly someone didn’t want that saxophone invented 

#incompetent time-travelling saxophone haters

rob-anybody  -

"You had one job!"  The Master scowled.  "If the saxophone is developed, there will be too much bad incidental sex music in movies.  We can not allow that to happen!"

"I tried.  And I tried."  The assassin looked defiant.

"And tried, and tried, and failed.  And FAILED."  The Master looked at the glowing screen, which showed the slide show of every attempt made on the Boy’s life.

"We still delayed saxophone development by years."  The assassin was always one to look on the bright side of life.  Especially since it was his life now that was on the line.

"And with every attempt, you have made him stronger!  He’s almost 30 now!"  The Master pointed at the last series of shots, of a tall, beautiful brown-skinned man slowly taking off his cravat and unbuttoning his frilly shirt, revealing amazing developed pectorals and seriously cut abs the smooth skin marred with several scars.  The subject turned, and the tight-fitting trousers failed, much like the assassin, to conceal the magic within.  "Look at him!"

"I am - I am!"

"Not like that!"  The Master slapped his riding crop across the screen, startling the assassin.  "You’re going to have to go back.  Try again."

"Okay."

The Master looked grim.  “Try not to sound so happy.”

(via rob-anybody)

stand-up-comic-gifs:

The 80s were the worst two years of my life. - Matthew Broussard

(via soyonscruels)

voiceofnature:

So I dyed my cats pink with leftover beet water. No regrets! <3 :D I had to wash them because of some oil spill they had gotten into, and chose to use the beet water, which is perfectly safe. I had no idea it would really make them this pink.

voiceofnature:

So I dyed my cats pink with leftover beet water. No regrets! <3 :D
I had to wash them because of some oil spill they had gotten into, and chose to use the beet water, which is perfectly safe. I had no idea it would really make them this pink.

(via rapunzelie)

-everdeen:

Breaking Bad Alternate Ending [x]

(via iamkuhan)

pinkgills:

the dude who pulls out a cigarette in front of a girl with lung cancer and then acts like sir dickweed mcfucklamp when she doesn’t understand the worst metaphor on earth seems to be tumblr’s newest squeeze

(via nerdfighterfighter)

timemachineyeah:

Forgive the Google Translate but THAT’S THE OFFICIAL SAILOR MOON TWITTER AND THE PRODUCTER ATSUTOSHI UMEZAWA CONFIRMING THAT
THE ON APRIL 27
WE WILL GET THE VOICE CAST OF THE ANIME
AND OFFICIAL ART FOR ALL THE LEAD CHARACTERS

timemachineyeah:

Forgive the Google Translate but THAT’S THE OFFICIAL SAILOR MOON TWITTER AND THE PRODUCTER ATSUTOSHI UMEZAWA CONFIRMING THAT

THE ON APRIL 27

WE WILL GET THE VOICE CAST OF THE ANIME

AND OFFICIAL ART FOR ALL THE LEAD CHARACTERS

defcontwo:

“If you could pick any other Marvel superhero for the Winter Soldier to fight, who would it be and why?”

(via dainesanddaffodils)

kingcheddarxvii:

There is a special place in heaven for people who reblog things they don’t understand because they want to stay relevant. God loves you and your awkward suffering will be rewarded

the-sexylosers-club:

officialpigeon:

Typing an essay due tomorrow at 3 in the morning

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never seen anything more accurate

(via cleolinda)

midnitesurprise:

princess peach and her odd male friends train for sport’s

(via kingcheddarxvii)

particlefucker:

dont let tumblr make you believe that

-eating car hubcaps is cool

-being an inanimate object is acceptable

-post-avant jazzcore is better than progressive dreamfunk

-having a corporeal form is healthy

-france exists

-chemtrails aren’t real

(via selfmadesuperhero)

a-creepy-weirdo-has:

bitcheslovemyjingleballs:

a-creepy-weirdo-has:

what do birds do 

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I apologise for my ignorance, birds are important

(via shooting-star-summit)